Living Dead Beat

deodrant: you know when ur in a certain position in the car where its like wow if i get in a crash...

deodrant:

you know when ur in a certain position in the car where its like wow if i get in a crash im fucked

biologytextbook: a support group for people who began using popular slang ironically but now cannot...

biologytextbook:

a support group for people who began using popular slang ironically but now cannot stop

daywalkerindisguise: mom im meeting my friends see you later...

daywalkerindisguise:

mom im meeting my friends see you later bye

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themanliness: Sesto Elemento | Source | More

themanliness:

Sesto Elemento | Source | More

timeywimeyteapot: have you ever thought about how weird sleeping is like we basically dress...

timeywimeyteapot:

have you ever thought about how weird sleeping is like we basically dress ourselves in special sleeping clothes and lay on special sleeping mats then spend the next few hours completely comatose all the while hallucinating vividly

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coolguyemote: coolguyemote: what if u were having sex w/ someone and they were getting all...

coolguyemote:

coolguyemote:

what if u were having sex w/ someone and they were getting all intimate and whisper "babe lets try something new" and then they shove a hot cheeto in your butthole

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vengerturtle: #omg tony's face #he's like shit i don't get...

vengerturtle:

#omg tony's face #he's like shit i don't get it #quick look at him does he get it #okay good he doesn't get it either #psh i'm a genius of course he doesn't get it

lindzar: b-ound: So I was in line at the grocery store...

lindzar:

b-ound:

So I was in line at the grocery store earlier, and there was an older lady in line behind me. She saw that I was wearing a bracelet with rainbow on it. She then asked me if I was gay, which I replied no. She then told me to take the bracelet off because it's for "faggots." To that I say, "Well I happen to like 'faggots'." Then the cashier heard the conversation and told the woman that that particular register was for faggots only, and asked her to leave. The woman said that she wanted to speak to the manager. The manager came and guess what, he was gay. 

Lets just say the woman left without her groceries.

dude best thing I read all night

systemofadowny: My film teacher was telling us about the time that he and two girl friends were out...

systemofadowny:

My film teacher was telling us about the time that he and two girl friends were out eating when two feminists came over, sat down, interrupted him mid conversation and proceeded to just ignore him. Eventually they turned around, looked him up and down and said "so what do you like to do?" and he just replied "I like to fuck women".

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jonnymclaughlin: How Tumblr works.

jonnymclaughlin:

How Tumblr works.

systemofadowny: ixnay-on-the-oddk: rough-slut-fucker: Oh this...

systemofadowny:

ixnay-on-the-oddk:

rough-slut-fucker:

Oh this will not end well for you

How disturbing and inappropriate

Oh this will not end well for you… because there is a giant alien being right behind you!!!!!!

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fro5ty: bookspaintandfireflies: thetimetravelersguidetothegalax...

fro5ty:

bookspaintandfireflies:

thetimetravelersguidetothegalaxy:

cunt-punch39:

Til death do us part

This might be the coolest thing I've ever seen in my life.

Okay, guys, I know I said I was going to bed but can I just point out one little thing here?

Do you notice how it's blurry at the beginning and suddenly sharpens at the end?

When it's blurry, it's because when you're in love, you supposedly don't see anything other than the person you love.

And when it sharpens, it's because the world has come back into focus now that their loved one is gone.

SYMBOLISM.

Yes. 

woah

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